Ballz Guinea Pig goes bye bye

A few nights ago I made another sale on Etsy.   I get such a thrill from seeing one of my diaper cakes loved enough to be bought.  My desire to sell them has become only a perk I get of happiness.  Will I retire from this?  Chances are high that I wont but the near satisfaction of selling them and having the excuse to make another one to take its place is enough to continue.

The other night that desire was raised to a much higher level of satisfaction.  It was late in the evening and I got a confirmation email that my Guinea Pig Diaper Cake chair was sold.   The buyer wanted the cake out as soon as possible.  So I had no time to spare.   I had to have that Guinea in a cellophane bag and into a box to be shipped.   It was late at night and daddy was about to put Calista to bed.  I told daddy to please tuck her in while I got the cake ready to ship.   My baby girl stands up on our bed and says,  “Mommy are you going to do the popcorn?”

With that smile she always put on my face I said yes baby I am going to do the popcorn.   Popcorn was the stira foams I gathered in the garage to ship out my diaper cakes.   She enjoys helping me put the popcorn into the boxes to every diaper cake I ship.

So every cake has a story, this particular one was going to Boston.  So she asks me,  to tell her the story over and over on where the diapie cake was going.   I would say, ” baby,  the diaper cake is going to be put in this box and I will take it to the mail man tomorrow, they will put it in a plane and it will fly all the way up to Boston.  Then another mail man will take it in a truck to the house of where the new baby will be. ”  She continued to ask me to tell her the story over and over.

As we filled the box of popcorn, we shook it to make sure it was shake proof,  she helps me put the tape and label on the box.   “There mommy, another one of your diapie cakes is ready to go to a baby.”

My plushes and  diaper cakes are a hobby, but having my baby girl enjoy them with me, makes them so memorable.

As I turn down the lights in the living room and I we leave the box all packed and ready to be shipped ,  I watch her walk up the stairs,  the cacho in her hand.   I thank god to have given me my greatest plush that is not of plush but of heart and soul,  my baby girl.

KinderGarden – Mommy’s Tears

Today we wake up early with the drill down, get Calista to school on time.  Her first day of Kindergarden and I am hardly emotionally ready.  My baby girl has been going to VPK but something about that first day of real school that brings you to tears.  As I walked  you  in today, my thoughts and worry drew me to think of all the positives and negatives you would be facing going forward.

As we walk down the hallway headed toward her room, we bump into her friend Melanie,  she was in another classroom but in the same hallway.  My baby girl walked in a bit hesitant and sat at her table.  Her new friends sitting with her are  Philip, Carlos and Anne.

Her daddy and I slip in a few pictures, got a few instructions from her teacher, and walked toward the door.  My baby’s  expression was memorable.  A non smile expression surfaced her face. Looking at us in a sort of timid and unpleased way she softly cracks a smile at us and directs her view down to the desk.  We make our way toward the door and I wave at her one last time.   We step out to the hallway and I feel the emotions start to overtake me.  I say to myself, “why are you so emotional,  you have done this before.  You have left her in the hands of the teachers since she was two, why this sadness now.”  Walking down the hallway I see another mother rubbing the tears from her eye.  She leaned against the wall and sobbed like a baby girl.  Her sadness will be something I remember years to come.  That moment my emotions came and as we hit the door to leave the hallway I let it out.

Why does kinder garden hurt us the mommies so much?  It’s the moment when our babies take the first leap to adulthood.  They are now on their way to educated themselves to one day hold a place in our society.

My baby girl,   in her white uniformed shirt and little  light brown skirt with her hair “half of it down and half of it up” as she would say, today walk into a classroom to start her journey into adulthood.

As  I brushed away my tears I prayed to Jesus to keep you safe always.  For your a soul of an angel, my angel that god has so gracefully given me.

I love you Calista.

Pillow Pet for a Mothers Day Gift

A few weeks ago I was in BJ’s doing some shopping and my little girl was wondering the isles with me. Asking questions on everything like any five year old would do. I always drive-by the toy isles since I am a kid at heart.

I stopped at the box of Pillow Pets and looked through all the cute faces. They had ladybugs, frogs pigs, and a few other cute faces. I didn’t realize I did my usual routine of standing there and stare at a product and over analyze if I should spend the money or not. I wanted a pillow pet but could not find justification on getting my grown a#% one. My little girl tugs on my pants and says, “Mommy whats wrong?” I said, “Baby I am looking at the pillow pets.. I love the piggy.” In her sweet voice she says, “Mommy get it.” I answered, “No baby, I am to old to get one.”

Well today on Mother’s Day I got a pillow pet and the piggy no less. My Husband went in to BJs for some shopping and went with our daughter. He was looking for a card to give me today. He tells me that as they went by the toy isle she ran to the pillow pet box and said, “Daddy Mommy would love the piggy pillow pet.” He asked her, “You really think so baby? ” She replied, “Yes daddy she was staring at him the other day and said that she was to old to get a pillow pet.” So the pillow pet made it into the shopping cart and into my arms.

My baby girl gave me the pillow pet with such an exciting glow today. My husband asked if I liked it, I could only say I LOVE IT!!! As I embraced my baby girl and said thank you, she whispered, “its ok mommy to have a pillow pet.  I don’t think the piggy thinks your old”.

The little things that make life worth living!!!!

Passion for the Plushes

Remembering back to my young years,  I was a sucker for the cute stuffed animals.   My room was filled with plush animals even as an adolescent.  With the years passing me  I use to think back on those days and remember how I would stream a yarn wire across my bedroom ceiling and have all my stuffed animals hang from there.  For a 16 year old that was quite a baby room I might say.  But now in my mid 30s I was convinced that evidence of my youth was only that of a memory.

My daughter the other day brought tears to my eyes when she said something that just melted my heart into pieces.  I have not mentioned it in this blog but anyone that knows me and follows my other blogs knows that I create baby shower gift arrangements.  If you took a peek inside our family office at home, you would see a mini factory of arts and crafts of which its sole purpose is to make baby gifts.   And on the side I have a shelf and box full of the cutest plushed animals you can find in the market today.  My daughter walks in the other day while I am getting a few centerpieces ready for a baby shower and said,  “Mommy I love all you fluffy animals. When I grow up I want to make pretty things like you that way I can have stuffed animals in my room forever.”  It dawned on me that moment that I had never let go of my passion for the plushes.  I just never realized that my passion to building beautiful baby gifts was my outlet to letting me be a kid every moment I spent make a beautiful piece.

The very week I found out I was pregnant back in February, 2005  I bought Tubby of the TY Pluffies collection.  He sat on my desk at work through my pregnancy.   Everytime I would look at him it gave me a sense of peace and serenity while I await my baby girl.

Just another kids Tale

The well known story of the Turtle and the Heir has been around for ages.  We all know the main concept to the folk tale.    The dedicated and slow turtle pushes and pushes until he succeeds.  Overconfident Heir becomes too confident and loses a race meant to be a given task.  But what if we considered the story a bit deeper.  We all know that without the heir being so overconfident, the turtle would not have a chance in life to beat him right?  The famous lesson to learn is slow and steady always preveils and overconfidence can lead you to losses.  But again, considering the true possibility of the heir losing is hard to grasp.

What if the true lesson to learn is not what we have been told but to really look at the turtle’s capability to block out all that is expected and what seems to be impossible and just tackle what would in most sensible minds, be not worth attempting.
One of the hardest things to do is to block out other’s preception of ourselves and what seems to be impossible.  One’s true achievement is better met by focusing on yourself and not how fast, intellegent, or gifted others are compared to you. Instead your focus should be what you can do at your time and pace.   Once you can learn to stop from trying to achieve and compare yourself to others, things seem to happen alot easier.   Our Turtle friend in this  story was not interested in knowing how fast he needed to go to finish first, he just wanted to get there.  And that is the key to achieving.   The Heirs abilities and strength were never considered by the turtle since it made no difference to his goals and desires.

This story and its lesson was something a good friend of mine shared with me a few years ago. 🙂

Baby Kisses

My little girl who is now 2.5 years old has this great ability to melt my heart with her actions.  But more then anything is her unlimited amount of affection ready to show at every moment.   With her two tiny hands she grabs my face and holds me close to tell me, “Mommy I luv yuooo”.  She ends her great task of melting me by giving me a tender kiss on my cheek or a delicate touch on my lips.

The incredible thing about life is that that very child that melts you at such a tender age will grow faster then a blink of an eye.   Will the memories on her tender kisses hold the day she comes home at the age of 15 demanding something I cant give her?  Will that same child that makes me feel as though she has nothing else in life breaking our mother-daughter bond, break my heart the day she says she hates me and wishes I was not around.  Would that cute boy at school be the center of her world?  Would those popular girls be the people she now looks up to?  What a thought to think my precious baby will most likely drive me out of her life because she will consider me too old fashion and only a detriment in her life.

But the one thing I try to remind myself everyday is that my biggest job in life is to create a strong bond between her and I. Build a strong moral foundation to last her through those tuff years.The foundation you give your baby in the first 5 years of their lives will be the very thing that will bring them back to you.

Adolescent years are tuff and no matter how great of a parent you are your children will put you to the test.  For now I will teach her all the things I can and remind her that no matter how old I get or how un cool I may become I will always be her best friend who loves her and will never stop loving her.

And when she is 30 if that foundation was well taught, the rugged road she will have face in her adolescent years will smooth out and she will come home.  She will then say, “Mom, I really do love you!” and that will remind me of these moments, when she can barely pronounce those worlds.

I know this because, now, at 34, the only best friend I know from all my years is my mother.  I love you mom and thank you for your great work in my early years.  I can only hope to be half the mommy you were.

Penny Worth Millions

A few years ago I met a friend at work that because of circumstances of life we became close. We happened to get pregnant at the same time and we encountered all the ups and down of pregnancy together. Around the last trimester of our pregnancy we would take walks around the office building for obvious reason understood by every pregnant women. On one of those walks we came across a penny. She managed to slowly bend down as any 7 month pregnant women would and picked it up and close her eyes for a few brief moments. I didn’t say anything, I figured it symbolized something to her. A few days later, again we came across a penny and she did the exact same thing. So I had to ask her, ” Why do you pick up pennies and hold them so dear?” She smiled and said, “I was once told that for every penny that is put in your path its a reminder that you must trust god. Every penny has it clearly written ‘In God We Trust’. So what I do is think of anything going on in my life that is of uncertainty and put it in his hands. Then I grab the penny and keep it to remind me that he granted me the opportunity to know he is there.”I considered it such a sweet story. I thought of it for a moment and didnt think of it again for a few weeks. About a month later, I had an ultra sound where they mentioned that my baby was smaller then expected. You can imagine the awful thoughts running through my head. I thought the worst and feared the worst. My husband and I left the doctors office in complete silence. As we left our car to walk into a restaurant, the wind blew some type of paper to my feet. I bent down to see what it was and as I grabbed it I noticed it was a twenty dollar bill. I turned it around to make sure it was what I was thinking and the first thing that I noticed was the words in big “In god we Trust”. I thought for a moment on what was most troubling me and felt a sense of peace.

My baby girl was a perfect healthy girl. I hold this memory to be one of the ways he revealed himself to me. Why did the story of my friend mean so much and why right before that happened.

So now every penny I see is a chance for me to know he is there.